Have a Good One!

Happy 4th of July everyone!
I really hope you all have a happy and safe holiday.

As for me,
I don't have any special plans.
I could have gone out on the lake and watched fireworks,
but I get scared being in a boat,
surrounded by all that water.
I am happy that my son and his family can all be out there
enjoying the fireworks, though!

I did get invited to a cook-out today.
It started at one p.m. and is still going on.

The fact is,
I worked all day,
and just got out at five.
I am tired and my freaking knee hurts.
Has been since last night.
Kinda wears one on ya when you've been on your feet all day.

Plus it is so nice and quiet here.
It makes me want to take a nap.

I just plan on staying home tonight.
It is really no big deal to me.

As far as fireworks go,
I may miss tonights, or not,
depending on if the ball park
puts some on.

Plus, next Saturday,
we are having our fireworks here in the 'burg.
The fair is coming to town
and on the last day there will be a parade and fireworks.
I can stand out in the street and see those.
Or watch them from the beer tent. :)

Whatever you do for today, I hope you all enjoy it!!!

Just Another Day in the 'burg

What did I do today?
Hmmm....
Let's see...

For starters
I got up
at 5 a.m.
Grabbed some coffee
Went to babyset

By 6 a.m.
I had put Codeman
back to sleep
and fell asleep
myself.

By 7 a.m.
I heard Magill
get up for school.

By 9 a.m.
the two little ones
were up
and Magill would be home soon.
It is the last day of school.

Between 9 and 10
I fed the little ones
dry Lucky Charms
and slices of cheese.

Magill helped
me pack the
diaper bag with
two changes of clothes
for the little ones.

I made a bottle for
Codeman
called A to
find out where
there was another carseat
and set off to my house
with the three kids.
I got to my house
only to discover
I left the bottle
and the formula
at YS.
With no key.

Between 10:30 and 12:30
I watched Magill
practice training
the dogs.

She wants to become a dog trainer.
She is eleven.
For some reason
the dogs
listen to her.

At 12:30 I washed
the two little ones
changed the diapers
and put them both
in clean outfits.

Magill had a Dr. appointment
at 1:30 so she also got ready.
She needed a physical
to enter sixth grade.

When we got there
we only had to wait
a few minutes.
So we checked out their fish tank
which contained a couple of clownfish.

When Lexi, who is two,
saw the clownfish,
she started yelling
"Emo! Emo!"

She had looked
through the book
about "Nemo"
earlier today.

When Magill went in for her physical
the nurse thought I was Magill's mother!
She said I looked way to young to be a gramma.

I fed the little ones
animal crackers
while Magill got
her physical.

After that was over,
I decided to take the kids
to Mickey D's.
They could eat and play there for a bit.

After about an hour there,
we came home to wait
for their mom to pick them up.

When we got here
I went to my bedroom
to put my purse away.

Something was different.
My bedroom door
is now propped against
the dresser.

I have no idea what happened there
I will have to ask him
when he gets home from work.

At 4 the kids were picked up
by their mom.

As I was making coffee,
a friend stopped by to
drop something off.
I went out on the front porch
to talk with him a few minutes.

I told him my grandkids
had just left.
He asked me if I needed my back rubbed.
I told him no, but thanks for offering.

Here I am, still covered in Mickey D's ketchup
that Codeman managed to get all over.
My living room is full of
baby blankets, cushions,
and toddler toys.

And not one,
but two ferrets
in separate cages.

Don't ask!
And I plan on telling him
when he gets home,
that he does not see two ferrets
and two cages
he is just seeing double! :)

Yup.
Just another day in the 'burg.

Rain

My sister sells skin care products and cosmetics
so a few of us girls decided we would have a facial
and become familiar with the products she is selling.

Some of the "girls" included my best friend "D" and my mom.
We had a good time laughing and giggling,
plus we all bought a few things.
"D" bought some tinted lip gloss with spf
in it because she swears her lips are sunburned.
I told her either that,
or she has been smooching too much with her boyfriend!

Then D and I decided since it was supposed to rain all day Saturday,
we may as well hang out together
and go shopping for Father's Day.
Neither one of our father's are still living
but she wanted to get something for her FIL.
I just wanted to get out of the house.

Saturday morning we had downpours!
I sat and watched it out the living room window.
All morning it rained.
All morning traffic kept going by my house.
Where is everyone going in the rain?
And why is there so much traffic today?
Whatever.

The rain let up and D came and picked me up to go shopping.
We headed off to WalMart.
Twice.

The first time we went through the village toward town.
Seems the road was flooded.
Beings how we had a four wheel drive,
we slowly drove through it,
figuring we would turn on the highway to avoid even more flooding up ahead.
Wrong.
They blocked the highway road off
and were going to block off the way we just came.
So we quickly turned around and yes,
went slowly back through the water,
to head out the same way D had come in.
Told ya we had a lot of rain!

So we are gabbing and laughing
and telling each other how we should have realized the road had flooded out
and that is why there was so much freaking traffic going by my house.
It was the only other way out.

Then I realize that D has gone through the neighboring town
and had turned on a road that floods every single time it rains practically.
I didn't say nothing.
Never mind I kept trying to look around the car ahead of us
to see how soon we would be hitting water.

As soon as she sees the water she wonders why
she picked this street of all streets
when she knows this one always floods.
I grinned.
So we slowly go through this water too.
Only this time it wasn't so bad
because we could still see the lines in the road
so we knew how deep it was.

We get to WalMart and find nothing we want
so we go to KMart where she found something nice for her FIL.
Then we decide it is too early to go home yet,
so stop at Sally Ann's to check out their clothes.
I need some pants for work.
I have exactly one pair left.
Saturday morning the dog chewed
two pieces of my pant leg off my least favorite pair.

So we checked out the whole store.
I looked for jeans for work.
Nothing.
I looked at shorts for work.
Found three pair.
Two different sizes.
Then I checked out slacks.
Found a couple pair.
A third size.
I have no idea what size I take anymore.

I tried them all on
and the only thing that fit
was a pair of capri's that were on the hanger in the dressing room
that I hadn't even brought in.
And that was one size smaller
than the smallest size I had picked out.
The only things is....
I don't like the way capri's look on me.
My legs are too long and skinny
and look more so in capris.

I did find a brown stoneware coffee pot
that will go nicely with my two brown stoneware mugs.
So I bought that.
D bought some lawn chairs for her son.

We had a lot of fun shopping.
It was a good way to spend a rainy Saturday!

Just Breathe

Does real love die?
What is real love?
Does it last forever?

Today I had to do something I didn't really like so good.
As a result, I am stomping down all my emotions and doing my best to hide from them
I feel sad, angry, helpless, hopeless.
On the other hand, I am proud of myself for standing up for me.

I feel guilty.
For no reason.
And yes, it is a looong story that many of you do not know.

This may be a mixed up bunch of words for the rest of you.
For me, it is therapy.

I almost cried when he walked out the door and up the street instead of asking me to take him up to the garage to get his truck.
I really thought he had the truck here.

Maybe he really thought I would say no, or maybe he didn't want me to take him.
I guess, too, it was the look on his face--a mix of pouty, mad, hurt.
You know it hurts me to make people feel this way.
Whether they deserve it or not.
It is so much easier to say something hurtful when one is fighting with the other.
That is just it.
It wasn't a fight.

I would call it:
The Truth

I told him I was not going to California with him.
OK.
It started out like this:
Can you get your vacation for those days?

Now I knew this was coming either today or tomorrow and I started to fidget.
And I said:
Yes, I can get those days off.
I am just not sure that I want to go.
For a number of reasons.

Now I am thinking if he has listened at all to me over the past few months then he knows exactly what I am talking about.

He says not looking at me:
This might be the last time you will see my mother alive.

And I am all:
So what's the difference?
You never go see my mother and she is 80 years old.
You haven't even gone with me to see her on Mother's Day for the last five years or so.

He says:
I go see your mother once in a while.

I let it go for a bit and then:
You do know why I don't want to go, don't you.

Yeah, cuz of the way I acted last time we went.

Yes.
So why would I want to go and possibly get into that situation again?

And then he says:
It won't happen again.
And adds:
As far as I know.

So right there is the escape clause for him.

And my mind is all yelling:
Don't go!
You will end up hating yourself!!

So I say that to him:
Well, I am not taking the chance.
Cuz if it did, I would end up hating myself for the rest of my life.

And then he starts:
I bust my ass for..

Where I interupt:
You bust your ass for what?
So you can take me on vacation that you plan and I follow?
You never even ask me.
You just plan.
Why don't we do anything I want to do?
I have always wanted to go to the Blue Heron Festival
and you won't go with me there.

HE says:
Yeah, and that costs what?
$90 a day?
For what?
To walk around?

And I am thinking:
And flying me to S. California for ten days isn't expensive?
And I don't even want to go.

I said:
You are paying for the live music.
I have always loved live music, whether it is country or rock.

Him:
Then go to the Blue Heron Festival!

And I am like:
Right! You know I have to work those days.
It is the fourth of July!
(I could go at night after work, but I won't go at night by myself.)

He is like:
Yeah, you have to work.

Then he gets mad and says:
Fine then! Do what the fuck you want to do!

And for once he didn't add: You do anyways.

I tell him:
You know, I could be saying--Oh, don't go out to your mother's for vacation.
Stay here, and do something we both want to do.
It's not fair!
I am telling you, to go see your mother.
You deserve to go.
You have my blessing.
But don't make me go.
I won't enjoy it anyways.

He's all:
Fine!
You go your way and I will go mine.
I won't do anything with you.
I won't ask you to do anything with me.

Then he got ready for work and left.
And I wanted to cry.
I am a tenderheart.
Very tender.

And I put my book down on the table and said to myself that I am not even going there.
Not today, not tomorrow, not next week.
I am not gonna cry and make an issue out this.
This is something I had to do for me.
And I didn't cry.

I am glad I said that I wasn't going.
But I also know that is was a turning point in my marriage.
The good thing is:
I know in my heart that this had to happen.

There will changes this summer when he gets back.
Possible even before he leaves.

Do I feel bad?
Hell, yeah.
But I would feel worse if I went and treated me the way he treated me last time.

So for now?

Just breathe

Come on and Dance with me

Will you take
my hand
and
dance with me?

Dance
until
the darkness
goes away?

Dance until my heart
no longer feels
any
pain?

Dance
until the
dawn
once again
nourishes my soul?

Come on and dance with me

Dance with me
until my true love gazes
into
my eyes

Come on and dance with me

And make
the
darkness
go
away

Come on and dance with me

this

one

last

time.

PARTY TIME IN P.A.!!!

They be partying in Pittsburg tonight!!!
For the second time in four months!!
The Pittsburg Penguins just won the Stanley Cup!!

Rock on!!!
Party on!!!

Turtle Time

About two weeks ago,
my friend D from work was saying
she took her grandson to the pet store to buy a turtle.
The only turtles they had cost $150!
She said she didn't know what kind it was.
She said it had a pretty shell that looked something like a sand dollar.
Needless to say, her gs did not get a turtle that day.

Jokingly, I said she could come down to the 'burg
and get one out the swamp or near the river.
She laughed and said no thanks
but asked Steve when he was on his travels
if he could find one for her gs.

Soooooooo
Tonight after work I took Foxy for a walk.
It was just supposed to be up one sidestreet and down the other.

But..
On the other sidestreet
a woman was walking her little dog, Maggie
who was not a happy camper
that Foxy was walking down the cross street.
Instead of turning up the street Maggie was on,
I just kept going straight to take the long way around.
I figured it would be easier on Maggie's owner and all.

Foxy and I got as far as where
there is a mowed path that is quite wide
and goes through some trees
with a small creek running through it.
I was on the street looking down the mowed path to my right,
when I saw something that looked like it might be a turtle shell.

As we got closer, I realized it was a turtle.
Probably about six or eight inches long
and three or four inches wide.
I pointed it out to Foxy.
She ignored it until it started to move.
Then she was all interested in it.

It dawned on me that D's gs wanted a turtle.
I didn't know if Steve had gotten him one or not.
I turned around and walked back to the street
and was going to leave it there.
Then I thought
if Nico wants a turtle,
then Nico shall have one.

So Fox and I went back down the path
and I picked the turtle up with my sweatshirt
and wrapped it up and casually carried it home.

I had no idea what kind of turtle this was.
If it turned out to be a snapping turtle I would take it back immediately.

So I get home and said to him
Do you know what kind of turtle this is?
He says
No, but I do know that snapping turtles have a spiked type of tail.

By this time, the turtle had withdrawn into its shell
so I was holding onto it and poking my finger into the shell.
He's all
Don't be putting your finger in there!
You could get bit!!

I am like
Dude!
I was born and raised in the country!
(Like he doesn't know this already)
I am not about to be poking my finger into the front of the shell!
I happen to be poking his backside!!
And I turned the shell around and told him
Look in there, you can see his head .
I am poking his backside!
Duh.

I put the turtle in an empty garbage can
and put some hay in it
while I went online to see what kind of turtle I had.
It is indeed a painted turtle!

So I called D and she said
No, Nico hadn't gotten a turtle yet.

I told her my story and she laughed
and said if I could keep it tonight,
that she will go after work tomorrow
and get what Nico needs to keep a turtle.
So I fixed the turtle up a nice little place with water and stones,
hay and grass,
some veggies and fruit chopped up for tonight.

And tomorrow Nico will have his turtle!

Personally, I am glad it wasn't a snapper.
Cuz if it was,
I wouldn't be taking it back to where I found it
carrying it in my sweatshirt!!!!